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Whole Foods no longer a “grocery” store; breaks new ground into being an all-natural, expensive way of life

Published by Jake Allen March 9th, 2005 in Uncategorized

Whole Foods, the giant anti-retailer swallowing up smaller co-ops nationwide, now opens showtime shopping complex at headquarters. 1 part Disney, 2 parts Gatlinburg, the chain expects the departmental entertainment concept to spread. They want to take grocery to Disney World, only with lots and lots more alcohol. Regardless of the other debates over chemically enhanced food . . . organic grows green.

“We’re not Holy Foods,” explains co-President Walter Robb, chief creator of the new store. “We’re Whole Foods.”

“They’re not selling food,” supermarket guru Phil Lempert says. “They’re selling life.”

“We don’t think you’ll go to hell if you don’t shop at Whole Foods.”

Wait a second . . . who said anything about hell?
And there is a massage studio too. Now that’s a reason to get in the Volvo and drive right down!!

Madness?

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4 Responses to “Whole Foods no longer a “grocery” store; breaks new ground into being an all-natural, expensive way of life”  

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  1. Gravatar Icon 1 Phil Phil Mar 9th, 2005 at 7:12 pm

    “I moved to Austin for Whole Foods”

    Hey, me too!

    Not really.

  2. Gravatar Icon 2 Sarah Sarah Mar 10th, 2005 at 9:16 am

    I still shop at the local co-op and farmer’s markets. The folks in Frederick seem pretty dedicated to our co-op (not for profit co-op!) Granted we all live in fear and dread that Whole Foods will come and take over!

  3. Gravatar Icon 3 Jake Allen Jake Allen Mar 10th, 2005 at 10:44 pm

    But do they give not for profit massages? Do they? Do they?????!?

    And what about the not for profit walk-in liquor fridges?

    /isn’t granola cheaper at Walmart anyway?

    Madness.

  4. Gravatar Icon 4 Sarah Sarah Mar 11th, 2005 at 3:12 pm

    I should check into the not-for-profit massages. :o) The granola at Wal-mart is no match for Grizzlies. If you buy it in bulk, it isn’t so bad. The nuts are raw and salt-free and the dried fruit is additive-free. And ohmygosh is it GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD! *drooling*

    By the way, if you have never had a fresh, organic granny smith apple….. The first time I bit into one, I had a foodgasm. OOOOOOOOOOOOO!